o god i'm sooooooo jealous im turning neon green in the face..

he's out with a girl and her friends.. most of the time i'm very open-minded about him going out with his friends, regardless the sex. i will even tell him to enjoy himself and not even probe where they're going or when he'll be coming home..

this time round is different.. that girl he is with now is our ex-colleague.. a close (?) friend of his...
well, more importantly, she's got BOOBS so big that they will make any < D cup owners writhe away in shame...
before me and him got together, i've heard rumors and gossips about them having some sort of 'affair'(?) too strong a word to use? anyway, he assured me that nothing of that sort happened..in actual fact, the guy whom the girl had an affair with wasn't him..well, still it did leave me doubting.. for a long time (?)
i mean i don't mind them having a past or whatsoever..as long as now they're no more...
im actually very fine with it...everyone has a past, isn't it? and since he had made it clear that he wasn't the one, i should trust him... However, it's so difficult..

i didn't join them in the first place because i went out for dinner with a friend..
but i dunno why i got really disturbed by the thought that he was out with this girl...i kept imagining her boobs accidentally slapping into his face.
fine, i know this is kind of ridiculous..but HEY, which guy in this entire humanrace won't be turned on by BIG BOOBS??
okok...besides gays, marpoks and corpses?


I called him on his phone and the pub was so noisy we couldnt hear each other...
PUB = loud music, alcohol = go high = ......sex!!!!

my imagination ran wild, i sent venomous sms to his phone just now.. i was just trying to be the most difficult woman on the surface of this earth.

Him: Dear i went wif them to a pub in orchard so wont be back early
Me: Why u go pub? go with who? u know them?
No lah but they keep saying go then i anything. Wont be back very late
Who are they?
** friends
U dunno them can go out with them lor. u very close to **?
No lah. Dear wat u thinking?
U dun go out with my friends u say weird weird. now can go out with HER friends. u very close to her. what can i think?
Aiyo. I also dont know. I meeting her then her friends came. I dont know mah.
U say meet her and a few others. now say meet her and u dunno her frens come..so which is true? never mind. Enjoy yourselves!!
Dear dont like tat leh. i dont know they going pub mah. Anyway only go pub slack and drink only.
I don't like them thinking u are so close to her. anyway i trust u but not her. i admit i'm damn jealous u went out with her and frens.. who's she to u..but i'm so sleepy. i just wan to sleep and not bother. night
Dear you trust me enough liao. U sleep tight and early.

i know this is so unhealthy... a wise man/woman should never ever appear insecured before his/her partner..
dunno what has overcome me to have said such words...it's so unlike me...aey, i very demure one hor...(heh) but jealously can make the most demure woman murderous!!!

ARGHHHHHHH....drown my distress, sleep!!!!!